20/10/06
Dear LUTSF
Please
fínd enclosed the report on my trip, co-funded by the
Lisa Ullmann Travelling Scholarship Fund to engage in a five day workshop in
the somatic breathwork of llse
Middendorf. It was an extraordinary and very
nurturing experience and I am very grateful to LUTSF for the support that
enabled me to go. I sincerely hope the report gives some small insight into the
special nature of this work and my experience and I am now looking forward to a
process of deep reflection and assimilation that I feel sure will help me to
extend on and enrich my practice.
Beyond the workshop itself I found just being away from
home and my known working environments a welcome change, especially as the
responses I encountered in
I enjoyed the chance to join in a T'ai
Chi session in the Chinese square one morning, take breakfast at a small
Italian cafe and then wander up the wooden steps of Telegraph Hill listening to
the wild parrots squawking overhead. These, and many other wonderful
experiences, left my senses awakened and energies renewed. I feel reminded of
the importance of new experience and how this invites and nurtures a fresh
perspective. I will certainly encourage others to invest in their own ongoing
enquiries similarly and inform them of the generous and committed support the
Lisa Ullmann Travelling Scholarship Fund offers. Many thanks
to all of you at LUTSF.
Yours sincerely
Sean Feldman
Report:
Breath experience in
A workshop taken at the Middendorf
Breath Institute, September 2006
by Sean
Feldman
A few years ago whilst teaching a dance workshop in
The workshop involved five days of intensive and
focused study into the “breath experience” work
developed by Professor Middendorf over many
years. The days were split into three
sessions of one and a half hours each and throughout each session several
breath and movement exercises were explored.
Throughout each session we worked in silence with gentle direction and
guidance from the teachers and the time given for each task remained fluid,
allowing the experience to take it’s own pace.
Each exercise was followed by a period of reflection and this led into
discussion amongst the group. Throughout
the five days, we had three different teachers all working intimately with the Middendorf methods but each offering a very different
energy and perspective.
The sessions began by inviting us (the participants)
to quietly connect with the experience of our breath. Without judgement of any sort we were
encouraged to just notice what was happening and the “breath experience” then
developed from there, often leading into gentle movement based journeys and
always with the intention to “stay” with the experience of the breath
throughout. During the five days we
touched on various aspects of this work including breath awareness through
different parts of the body, breath in relationship to others and breath connection with the voice.
The first couple of days focused mainly on breath in
relation to the physical experience.
This was mostly through a process of ‘allowing’ the breath to simply
come and go, responding through movement as and when it felt natural and
appropriate to do so. First noticing the
movement of the breath and then gently extending on this.
The idea is simple but I found it an interesting
challenge, keeping my focus with the task of just “allowing” the breath to be
there. Doing these exercises I realised
how often in movement I control my breath.
My training has for the most part been based on developing a command of
the body and developing skills to initiate movement in response to very clear
instruction either from myself or from some other source. What’s interesting about the Middendorf work, in light of this understanding, is that my
experiences through the workshop seemed to suggest that there were other useful
ways of experiencing breath in relation to movement.
At times, when I felt I could successfully engage
with the intention within a task, the movements I did seemed to emerge
effortlessly from within. During such
moments, I became more aware of myself as a dancer and observer at the same
time. Maintaining a genuine sense of mindful enquiry, though, was a challenge. Sinking into the “experience” of my breath
and staying with what was happening, I’d willingly let go of the experience
just moments before.
Being truly present and awake to what was happening
and holding onto a memory of the experience that had just gone became an
interesting dilemma; one that invited many questions within me about the nature
of dance and authentic movement from a ‘breath’ perspective. How true are my responses, when what I’m
doing is reproducing an experience of movement I’ve been taught or previously
chosen to do? I found the questions that
emerged each day provocative and they helped me to stay open to whatever may or
may not transpire.
In summary, the breath work was subtle and the
experience of it profound. Through the
five days my understanding moved from a place where I felt I knew what my
breath processes were into a realisation of the fact that with each breath the
experience is unique. Just listening to
and experiencing my breath as it is, with no preconceptions offers me a more
intimate experience. This way of
experiencing brings me right into the present moment and this alone
demonstrates the value it might have as a study for dancers, especially those
dealing with the rigours of extensive movement that is complex and heavily
prescribed.
The week following the course I stayed on and joined
in some of the on-going practitioner classes.
This extra time also gave me an opportunity to talk with the director
and founder of the Berkeley Institute, Jeurg Roffler. Juerg has worked closely with Professor Middendorf
for many years and played a central role in the development of the work. This was clearly evident in his responses
throughout the course and through the depth of insight and clarity with which
he was able to answer my questions.
He explained to me the importance of “allowing” the
breath as opposed to “imposing” on the breath, which has often been my primary
tendency and intention when dancing. In
essence the Middendorf work encourages an experience
of the breath in its natural state, allowing the movement of the breath to come
and go to its own. I was fascinated to
note how the breath invites and supports movement almost without instruction
and that a conscious experience of this was always the starting point, whatever
aspect of breath awareness we were exploring.
This workshop offered me a wonderful and unusual
experience and I’m left feeling inspired to explore ways in which this approach
could usefully influence my own dance practice.
Though I feel this may take some time, the workshop helps me focus on
certain aspects of my work and already I notice specific patterns and habits
that could be usefully broken down and re-examined in the light of my
experiences at the Institute. The
workshop also helped validate my previous experience and understanding and I
feel the importance of this too.
Throughout the workshop I felt the teachers held and
directed the group energy very well.
Though we were a small group (just five of us), I was also impressed and
inspired by the breadth of personal and professional experience in the room. This offered up some rich and at times
surprising insight through the discussions and also encouraged an intimacy
between us that supported the level of enquiry that took place. One participant had a keen interest in breath
awareness in relation to death and mortality, another
was interested in breath awareness in relation to her work inspiring art and
personal expression in others. This
breadth of interest and personal investment revealed itself as one of the most
significant gifts of the course.
During the later stages of organising my trip I
decided to self-fund an extension to my stay allowing me time to explore the
dance scene in
In summary of my time in
Sean Feldman